SHOULD THE MAN REALLY LOVE THE WOMAN MORE FOR A RELATIONSHIP TO BE SUCCESSFUL?

Viv

While I won’t say it isn’t totally right for women to have this belief that the man should love more, I still won’t chastise women for having such beliefs. A lot of the times, women give more than their all just to make the relationship work, but at the end other it all they get cheated on, the men take their loyalty for granted and some even get abused physically. Those are the major reasons why a lot of women carved that belief that only when the man loves her more than she does, only then can a man truly appreciate her love.

You won’t blame the women for trying to be safe and avoid getting hurt just because they’re in love. Men are only trustworthy when they give a hundred percent in a relationship; unfaithfulness is a common feat when a man doesn’t give his total commitment, whereas a woman who gives even 70 percent of her emotions in a relationship can still stay faithful.

The notion that the relationship is better off when the man has more love than the women is a notion women believe just so they don’t get hurt — it’s simply a protective measure and you won’t blame them.

Drama

While love is a necessary ingredient for any relationship to be successful, I do not believe it is the ultimate. The most enduring relationships were (are) not built on love alone, rather, they’re built on mental maturity. The ability to know, and understand that your partner isn’t perfect, and that they’ll make mistakes and get on your last nerve sometimes but that doesn’t affect the way you both feel about each other. Two people can extremely be in love, but without the required mental maturity, they’ll not last one year because challenges will arise, and they wouldn’t know how to handle them unless they’re mentally prepared for the relationship; and by being mentally prepared, I mean being understanding and tolerant especially.

So, I don’t think a relationship can be preserved just by either party (the man or woman) having more love than the other, although I’ll have to admit that sometimes one party in the relationship has to show more maturity than the other for the relationship to last because there’s no way both can be perfect. One person has to be willing to make more sacrifices and compromise — which can be any party in the relationship, not necessarily the man. I’ve seen relationships and marriages endure because the woman is more understanding and tolerant, not the man— so it doesn’t have to be the man. What is important is that someone in the relationship must be willing to compromise for that relationship or marriage to last long. Love isn’t always adequate to sustain it.

That’s our take on today’s edition of our fortnightly Elcrema Sunday Love Special. Expect yet another thrilling edition a fortnight away.