You’ve just matched with her. You have one chance to make a good impression. You don’t want to mess this up, she’s wayyyyy to cute. So what will you say? Funny or direct? Corny of cute? Decisions, decisions…
Fear not, Tinder warrior, this article will take out the guess out of the equation and will give you PROVEN pickup lines that will works most of the time.
You’ll find 143 openers you can copy-paste and use. We’ve even segmented them based on different approaches, depending on your style. Thank me later 😉 So, shall we?
Top 7 Absolute Best Tinder Pickup Lines
Oh you just want to use the best ones right now? I don’t blame you, so here they goes. It’s no surprises that humor works well on Tinder (and in life in general). So these gems are mostly humorous and have been proven to work again and again.
If you prefer video:
1- Talking alone
- Hey! How was your weekend?
- I would totally let you take me for brunch tomorrow
- This is so us. Me doing all the talking and you sitting there, looking all cute
2- What will you choose?
To receive a cheesy pick-up line, press 1. To receive a generic salutation, press 2. To receive a crude sexual advance, press 3. To replay this message, press 4.
3- Use sparingly
What would you rather have from me?
- A nice date, restaurant and movie?
- Meaningful, intelligent conversations?
- Multiple orgasms?
I deeply regret that it is my unfortunate duty to bring it to your attention that you are above and beyond our maximum standards for looks. You are clearly an 8.5/10 and here on Tinder we only allow 6.5/10 max.
Your account will now be permanently CLOSED unless you reply to this message with your full name, phone number, how many marshmallows you can fit in your mouth at once (for internal stats) and the type of cuisine you prefer.
I would strongly advise you take this message seriously. Thank you for your cooperation.
5- Password help
Maybe you can help me. I forgot my password to my account and when I hit “password hint” it keeps telling me “[girl’s name] phone number”. Can you help?
*Some cheezy pickup line* Blah blah blah. Tinder tinder tinder. Haha a joke here, inappropriate message there. Can I have your number?
- [Guy]: If I had 4 quarters to give to the prettiest girl in the world, I would give you 3 quarters.
- [Girl]: …
- [Guy]: Well, the fourth quarter would be for our daughter, so take it how you want.
Top 12 Witty and Clever Openers
I think that a close second to humor is wittiness. Most girls will appreciate a smart comment and these will easily get you on the front lines of the “Hey, what are you up to tonight?”
- There’s only one thing I would change about you. Your last name.
- Can I take you out to dinner. Just smile for yes, or do a double backflip for no.
- When I text you goodnight later, what phone number should I use?
- Hey how do you pronounce your phone number?
- [Guy]: Hey! I’m glad to run into you again! / [Girl]: Did we ever met? / [Guy]: Yes, you don’t remember? In my apartment, next weekend…
- “How to get a hot girl to like you?” / Oh shit, I thought I was typing this on Google!
- Damn, I just lost my phone number. Is it okay to have yours, instead?
- Hi, do you have a few minutes for me to hit on you?
- Do you want to see my best pick up line? _________________________________
- I need some answers for my math homework. Quick. What’s your number?
- Hi, I’d like to add you to my professional network on LinkedIn.
- May I end this sentence with a proposition?
12 Funniest Tinder Conversation Starters
Sometimes you don’t need to make the girl all out laugh, just putting a nice grin on her face will do:
- On a scale of 1 to “Hey you in the bushes!” how creepy have your interactions on Tinder been so far?
- Do you have a job? I need a woman who can support me while I play video games all day.
- Hello. I am a Nigerian Prince and I can make you rich beyond your wildest dreams! I just need your phone number, bank account, and social security number.
- What do I have to do to get on your drunk dial list?
- (if she doesn’t respond the first time) We just matched and you’re already playing hard to get?!
- Going to Whole Foods, want me to pick you up anything?
- You thought you don’t have a chance with me? You’re completely wrong.
- Be unique and different, say yes.
- Listen, I know this profile is fake but can I get the name of the model you used so I can look her up for later tonight?
- What’s the best thing about elevator jokes? They work on so many levels.
- You make me wish I weren’t gay!
- I bet you $20 you’re gonna turn me down.
5 Direct Openers That Works
Depending on the situation, direct openers can work. Some girls will appreciate them, but a lot won’t. There’s no sure way to know, you just have to thrust your instinct on this one. Also, if this is too far from your style, it’s probably best to stay away from those:
- You’re coming over tonight to watch Game of Thrones and make out.
- [Guy]: Draw a line. Then draw a line just above that one. Then erase a few sections of the first line. / [Girl]: … / [Guy]: Here, I’ll show you what mine looks like: ___-___-___
- Hey [Girl’s name], where would you like to go on our first date?
- What do you like for breakfast?
- I’m fighting the urge to make you the happiest woman on earth tonight.
11 Crude Pickup Lines That (Might) Work [use carefully]
Hopefully I don’t have to tell you that most girls won’t find these pickup lines funny. That said, some of them will, and who knows, maybe a few will take you up on your offer. Be bold, my friend (or not…):
- A-B-C-D-E-F-G R-U-D-T-F with me?
- Want to come over to my place and watch porn on my flat screen mirror?
- I’m not a d*ck in real life, but I’ll play one in you tonight
- Nice legs, when do they open?
- Wow, you’re stunning, I think I just found the cure for impotence
- That’s a nice shirt. Can I talk you out of it?
- I’m a mindreader and Yes I will sleep with you
- Nice hair, wanna mess it up?
- I’m like a Rubiks Cube, the more you play with me the harder I get
- I know a great way to burn off the calories in that drink
- Tell your b00bs to stop staring at my eyes
16 Conversation Starters That Are so Cheesy They Might Just Work
These are the classic, beaten to death openers that girls have heard a hundred times before. But I guess, giving the right context, some of these might still work. Will you pull this off?
- I usually go for 8’s but I guess I’ll settle for a 10.
- You wanna know what’s beautiful? Read the first word again.
- If we were in school, you’d be the girl I’d pass notes to in class.
- Do you like this shirt? Thanks, it’s made out of boyfriend/girlfriend material.
- They say Tinder is a numbers game… so can I get your number?
- Hey, do you happen to have a Bandaid? I scraped my knee up pretty bad when I fell for you.
- You don’t know how many times I’ve had to swipe left to find you.
- I would flirt with you, but I’d rather seduce you with my awkwardness.
- I’ve lost my number, can I have yours?
- You make me wanna clean up my room.
- Can I tie your shoes? Cause I don’t want you to fall for someone else.
- Can I be your next mistake?
- Sorry, but you owe me a drink. [Why?] Because when I looked at you, I dropped mine.
- Do I know you? Cause you look exactly like my next girlfriend.
- I’m not actually this tall. I’m sitting on my wallet.
- Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money?
Other Openers That Didn’t Made The Cut But Are Still Worth a Look
Again, there’s old stuff in there, but I thought they had something to so I included them in this article. A little inspiration.. :
- I’m going to kiss you now. Say ‘Kiss Me’ if you want me to stop
- I have amnesia – do I come here often?
- Your shirt has to go, but you can stay
- If I flip this coin, what are my chances of getting either head or tail?
- If I said you had a great body, would you hold it against me?
- Hey, my name’s Microsoft. Can I crash at your place tonight?
- I’m new in town. Could you give me directions to your apartment?
- That dress would look great on my bedroom floor!
- I know where they give out free drinks… it’s a place called “My House”!
- I’m currently taking applications for a little spoon position. 1-10, how would you rate your cuddling abilities?
- I have 4% battery remaining. I chose to message you. Did I choose wisely?
- I woke up thinking today was just another boring Monday, and then I saw your photo on my app.
- Hey how’s your day so far? I just got a haircut without running it by my mom. I feel like such a badass.
- Can I borrow a kiss? I promise I’ll return it.
- You don’t know how many times I had to swipe left to find you!
- Rejection can lead to emotional stress for both parties involved and emotional stress can lead to physical complications such as headaches, ulcers, cancerous tumors, and even death! So for my health and yours, JUST SAY YES!
- Excuse me, I just noticed you noticing me and I just wanted to give you notice that I noticed you too.
- ? All I’m missing is the little spoon
- You’re so beautiful that you made me forget my pickup line.
- Can I borrow a kiss? I promise I’ll give it back.
- If I had four quarters to give to the four prettiest girls in the world, you would have a dollar.
- Anyone can buy you drinks. I want to buy you dinner!
- If looks could kill, you’d be a weapon of mass destruction.
- Do you know the difference between you and the new iPhone? The new iPhone costs $700 and your priceless.
- Don’t you just hate it when people try to use pickup lines on you?
- If I were to ask you out on a date, would your answer be the same as the answer to this question?
- [Crude] If I were a watermelon, would you spit or swallow my seeds
- Hey, just finished 873 pushups, pretty tired.
- [Crude] Burger King isn’t the only thing that is king-sized
- Big spoon or small spoon?
- Allow me to rescue you from your crowd of admirers.
- Quick: The Notebook or Sleepless in Seattle?
- Do you have an ugly boyfriend? No? Want one?
- What’s a smart, attractive man/woman like myself doing without your number?
- Two truths and a lie: ready, set, go!
- Your Sunday breakfast personality is __? A) Waffles & pancakes, slowly savored. B) Apple & granola bar on the run. C) Aggressive mimosas. D) Sleeping til lunch.
- My friends would be jealous if you went out with me.
- I’ve had a crush on you for 2 hours.
- How many times have you pictured me naked since we matched?
- My parents are so excited, they can’t wait to meet you!
- Does this mean I won’t be a virgin by the end of the week?
- [Crude] My mattress is a little hard. Would you like to help me break it in?
- Even if you had 0 followers, I’d follow you anywhere.
- Can I have your Instagram? My parents said I should follow my dreams.
- I’ll give up my morning cereal to spoon you instead.
- I wish I were cross-eyed so I could see you twice.
- If I could rearrange the alphabet I would put U and I together.
- My doctor says I’m lacking vitamin U.
- You raise my dopamine levels.
- Do you like raisins? How do you feel about a date?
- Aside from taking my breath away, what do you do for a living?
- Well, here I am. What were your other two wishes?
- Are you a bank loan? Because you’ve got my interest.
- Life without you is like a broken pencil… pointless.
- I know you’re busy today but can you add me to your to-do list?
- Hey, I think you have something in your eye. Never mind, that’s just your sparkle.
- Wouldn’t we look good on a wedding cake together?
- Your mom will love me.
- You see my friend over there? They want to know if you think I’m cute.
- You’re so cute you make me stutter. Wha-wha-what’s your name?
- Me without you is like a nerd without braces, a shoe without laces, a sentencewithoutspaces.
- If I were a cat I’d spend all nine lives with you.
- A boy gives a girl 12 roses. 11 real, 1 fa1ke and he says to her ” I will stop loving you when all the roses die”
- Congratulations, you have been voted the hottest girl here, your prize a date with me!
- I’m not staring at your boobs. I’m staring at your heart.
- Hi, I’m Mr. Right. Someone said you were looking for me?
- I thought happiness started with an H. Why does mine start with U?
- Hello. Are you taking any applications for a boy/girlfriend?
- How much does a polar bear weigh? [How much?] Enough to break the ice… Hi, I’m (insert name here).
- On a scale of 1 to 10, you’re a 9. I’m the 1 you need.
- I’m no mathematician, but I’m pretty good with numbers. Tell you what, Give me yours and watch what I can do with it.
- Is it hot in here or is it just you?
- Do you have a name or can I just call you mine?
- [Crude] Baby are you a lion? Because I can see you lion in my bed tonight.
- [Crude] I’m not a weather man, but you can expect a few more inches tonight.
- [Crude] What did you say your name was? I want to make sure I’m screaming the right name tonight.
- [Crude] Are you tired? Want to change that?
- [Crude] That sweater looks amazing on you. I bet I would too!
- [Crude] I might not go down in history. But, I will definitely go down on you.
- [Crude] Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?
So there you have it. 143 pickup lines to try and test. I know guys who will keep an Excel file with all the lines they tested and the response they got. A little over the top? Maybe. But they sure do get a lot of dates 😉
‘Till then, happy Tindering!