Is there anything like a perfect relationship partner? I doubt it, but many people actually believe that they represent that little section of how a perfect partner should be.
If you ask a lot of people, they would tell you that every human is imperfect in their own way and there is no such thing as a perfect person. However, this is only something we say and not something we really believe — I would explain. When two partners have a fight and you ask them individually the cause of their fight, it’s always the other partner; you would rarely see a partner who takes the blame and actually say ‘it was my fault’.
Many relationships and marriages have ended not because they stopped loving each other, but because both partners saw themselves as perfect, while seeing the flaws in the other.
Let’s make this practical. Pick up a pen and paper, write a list of things you don’t do right in your relationship, and then, write a list of the things you feel your partner doesn’t do right. We would all easily write loads of things our partner does wrong, but a majority of people would struggle to come up with the things they do wrong. This points to something: many relationship partners feel they are always right, many see themselves like they have little to no faults, while they can easily spot the imperfections in their partners.
One of the biggest cause of marriage failures stems from the fact that many people see themselves as the perfect partner, and many marriage counsellors are faced with the blame game married couples play almost every day of their lives. ‘It’s all my wife’s fault’ and ‘it’s all my husband’s fault’ they would tell you.
In reality, people actually see themselves as the perfect relationship partner.
Shawn