Love means different things to different people, and in a way different actions are quite needed in different relationships; a formula you used that worked well in one relationship might actually turn drastic in another. For example, Mr (Ms) A might love a partner that clings to them almost every hour — so being in a relationship with that person would mean that you get to spend every hour with that person, and it would work out fine. That same pattern may not work in another relationship with Mr (Ms) B; this person might be the one that loves some space quite a lot, and when you become too clingy with them, the relationship might turn sour.
My point is; different people need love to be shown in different ways.
The desire of some people is having their partner create time for them, they are less lonely and feel loved when their partner gives them the bulk of their time, and when that partner is as well eager to spend much time with them. Time can be said to mean a lot; time is priceless; the amount of time spent with a person can go a long way in determining how important you are in their lives. So, time is a good way to show love.
Some others are also influenced by the way you use your resources on them. They measure the frequency and worth of your gift items. These types are more endeared to the date nights, surprise gifts, your response to their needs and all the rest of it in determining how much you actually do care. It’s not just women, but men inclusive; they believe if you aren’t ready to spend your resources on them then it means you don’t really care about them.
Some others believe in attention; time is one thing but attention is another. Some people want their partner’s almost all the time, and if that attention isn’t available they would deem your love as ineffective. Attention could be shown in time, it could be shown in resources, it could be shown by just being there for your partner, by listening to their conversation, by understanding or at least wanting to understand them, by noticing things about them even if they don’t tell you, by complimenting them and a host of others. Lots of relationship partners strive in the attention they receive from their partners, and starve when there is a lack of it. The problem of so many couples in marriages is the lack of attention; that’s why you can hear a woman say “he loves me but he doesn’t give me much attention”; meaning love can be equated with attention.
So what I’m driving at is: what to you is the best way to show someone you actually love them? Or which do you want the more from a person you love: time, resources or attention?
Shawn