Being a good listener comes with a lot of benefits; it would help your relationship with your partner and your relationship with people in general. A lot of relationships fail because of inability of partner’s to listen to each other and miscommunication arises because of this singular act.
To form the habit of listening requires patience and conscious efforts; it isn’t just something that would happen easily. However, when you become a better listener, people would be willing to share things with you.
This is how you can be a better listener.
1. HOLD YOUR JUDGEMENTS
Sometimes, people’s assumptions and judgements hold them from listening to others. To be a better listening, you have to learn to keep your judgement away and just listen to what the other person has to say. If you already have a judgement or conclusion about what the person has to say, you would never be a good listener.
2. AVOID DISTRACTION
Avoid being distracted when having a conversation with someone; when you are distracted, you pass a message that you are not listening. Avoid using your smartphone, avoid walking about or making unconscious movements — just be still and listen. Let your body language pass the message that every part of you is listening.
3. LISTEN WITHOUT INTERRUPTION
When two people are talking, no one is listening — and when you interrupt someone from talking, you pass a message that you aren’t listening. To be a better listener, you have to avoid interruption.
4. MAINTAIN EYE CONTACT
Maintaining eye contact passes a message of being interested and that you are listening to the conversation. Maintaining eye contact shows that you are fully attentive.
5. ASK QUESTIONS
Ask thoughtful questions and try to clarify issues that you aren’t sure of. When you do this, you win over the person you are talking to.
6. SUMMARISE
After the person has talked, trying to summarise what that person has said would show that you were fully attentive. When you summarise what was said, you give the person a chance to confirm or correct your understanding of the situation.
Being a better listener would make you have better relationships with people and improve the relationship you have with your partner.
Jake