I was thinking of one thing that kills relationships gradually without couples knowing — what came to my mind almost immediately was retaliation.
Retaliation is that soft and easy voice at the back of your head that says ‘I have to pay him/her back’. The voice of retaliation is a smooth talker; it convinces you that your partner is wrong and you’re right, it convinces you to pay back to make your point, it gives you valid points on why you ought to retaliate. But should you? What would you actually gain?
The ruins of retaliation happen slowly but steady, till it reaches a point where things become unfixable, and then it smiles a giant smile in its heart, congratulating itself for destroying a loving relationship.
Retaliation is an evil seed; it can kill the understanding in a relationship, it can create grudges, lead to malice and all manner of negativities — retaliation makes a relationship childish. Sometimes, partners retaliate without even knowing — retaliation is really tricky. ‘He didn’t call me all day, I wouldn’t call him back’ — that’s retaliation. Anything prompting you to do anything negative back to your partner, anything prompting you to pay back is retaliation. It might seem little, but that’s how it starts till it leaves your relationship in ruins.
It’s better to speak to your partner and not let retaliation speak for you. Retaliation seeks reason, it finds fault, it brings hatred — it’s a relationship killer. If you love and value your relationship then never let retaliation creep in.