I have read a lot of posts and articles about relationships. I have also spoken to a lot of men and women around me, and in my experience, they all seem to share the same opinion regarding getting someone you like to notice you.
A lot of these people surprisingly think the best way to catch the attention of someone you like, and get them to want to get to know you is by pretending not to care at all. Like my friend, Joan put it, “It’s simple, really. Imagine running after something all the time, it makes you seem desperate and too easy, so even if they would have wanted you, that sort of approach damages any chances whatsoever of that happening. Making yourself a little unavailable on the other hand creates that aura of mystery and difference to you, which automatically draws them to you.”
Is that so though? Because I always thought that if you want something, you have to go for it. I mean, how am I supposed to know you like me if you keep pretending not to? The logic makes no sense at all to me, but it seems to be common practice amongst young people.
All my life, I have gone for those I want. And while I can’t say that it has turned out positive all the time, I know I have also scored some success with that approach.
I do get the whole “aura of mystery” thing, but let’s be honest, if you want a job, and you don’t apply for it or even enquire about it, how do you get hired? Even if your parent owned the company!
I believe in straight- up going for what you like/want, but then again, it is me, and what works for me. I would like to know what works for you too. Where do you stand in the divide? Do you believe in playing the pretense card or do you stand with me? What’s the best way to go for the person you like?