This is for the beautiful women out there…… Here we go!
- So SADE meets Ade in the university, they are both in the same faculty, Ade is slick, suave, the stuff eye candies are made of. Sade is a beautiful smart girl, but she doesn’t think she can attract his attention. Surprisingly, he notices her, and showers her with attention, Sade is flattered, pleased, and promptly falls in love. They have sex, often enough for Sade to assume the girlfriend role. Only thing is, when she voices out her assumption, a bemused Ade tells her, he doesn’t like tags… Yeepa!
LESSON ONE: If he didn’t ask you expressly to be his girlfriend, Babe, NEVER, EVER assume.
- Chike and Chika have been friends for donkey years, and Chike has been asking her out for that long, but Chika has been in a relationship and kept declining politely… When Chika and her boo broke up, Chike professes his undying, long suffering love to her. He promises to be everything her boo was not, and Chika readily agrees to move their friendship to the next level. Fast-forward to three months later, Chike is tired of her. He becomes emotionally distant, and there is a gap in their relationship. It goes without saying that their relationship didn’t stand a chance, and it fell through in a little while.
LESSON TWO: To some guys, you’re simply irresistible when you’re taken, but only when you’re taken.
- Cindy met Prince, whose charming ways swept her off her feet. They began dating in no time, and after the high of a shiny new relationship was over, Cindy began to notice things that bothered her. First, he never took her out on a date. They were always meeting up at his place, or hers. He would rather buy a ‘take- away’ pack, than eat out with her. It was okay sha, he said he didn’t like public places, they made him nervous. His relationship status on facebook was, ‘it’s complicated’ He wouldn’t put her picture up as his DP, the only time he did, was on her birthday, and his PM was “Happy birthday dearie, wish you the best” Hmmm. She had heard of his friends, seen their pictures, but the day she bumped into him and his friends in a café, he introduced her as ‘a close friend’. When she queried him for not properly introducing her, he said he was a private person. WHAAAAT!
LESSON THREE: Wake up girl… If he won’t acknowledge you to his friends, he definitely won’t acknowledge you to his mum.
- In all their six months of dating, Jill had never seen Jack show any real emotion. She could never ruffle his feathers, he was too calm and collected, too Michael Corleone to actually show how he was feeling. He thought it was weakness, to let his true feelings, and intentions be known to anyone, even her. He had a poker face, and she never knew when he was upset, happy, or even feeling mushy. Jill found it difficult to get through to him, and many times felt like she was in a relationship all by herself… *sigh* Well you know how it goes; “Jill felt hurt, and it broke her heart, and their love came tumbling after”.
LESSON FOUR: If it’s easier to get through to a rock, than to your boo, then he’s emotionally unavailable at the moment. Maybe you should port.
- Barbara and Ken have been dating for a while now, and Barbara is sure Ken loves her; at least he says he does. But something has been nagging her about him. The fact that her boyfriend was stingy: to her. She didn’t notice it at the start of their relationship because Ken was financially comfortable, and it was obvious that ‘money no be problem’, and she wanted to give the impression that she was an independent lady, who didn’t need his money…But independent or not, she believes that you can’t love without giving. And so, after three years of no valentine, birthday, Christmas, monetary or spontaneous gifts, she decides to have a talk with him. Ken stuns her by telling her he can’t spend his money on a woman who is not his wife, because she may leave him for another man, and advices her to be patient till they get married. Taah! For where? Pretty Miss Barbara hightailed it out of his miserly life. She had no intentions of staying in love, in a hopeless place.
LESSON FIVE: Guys spend their money according to their priorities. If you’re not on the budget, then maybe, just maybe, you’re not very important to him.
- DISCLAIMER: The characters used are all figments of my very interesting imagination. I am not talking about you. But if the shoe fits, well then by all means, wear it. Mwaah!
Miss May
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