We all hate the heart breaks and trauma that comes with a bad relationship, and even go to the extent of wishing we never entered that relationship. Everyone wants a loving, long-lasting and peaceful relationship; but just as life isn’t a bed of roses, so also are relationships.
Rather than regret being in that relationship, there are always lessons to learn from it.
Below are some important lessons you can learn from that bad relationship.
1. YOU CAN’T REALLY CHANGE PEOPLE
This is one relationship mistake many people make; thinking you can change your partner is a mistake in itself — this would only lead to quarrels and misunderstanding in the relationship.
2. YOU BECOME STRONGER
Being heartbroken might be awful and an experience you wouldn’t want a repeat of again; but in reality, you become stronger after a heartbreaking relationship. Yes, you might need time to heal, but it makes you stronger afterwards. Your mental strength, character or resilience is given a huge boost after such an experience.
3. EVERYONE HAS FLAWS
When you first meet a person, they might seem perfect to you, but after being in a relationship with that person for a while, you could begin to notice their flaws and faults. Everyone has them, but it’s how those faults are handled that determines how far the relationship would go.
4. LOVE ISN’T ALWAYS ENOUGH
People make that mistake of thinking that love is all they need to have a healthy relationship, but a bad relationship could teach you that love is never enough. You might love your partner and your partner love you back, but it’s never enough for your relationship to be healthy. If understanding isn’t present then the relationship would suffer in spite of the love that abounds.
5. SOME THINGS ARE JUST SUPERFICIAL
You fell for his good looks, broad shoulders, well-trimmed beards, his fashion style and demeanour; and as a man, you fell for her smooth skin, lovely face, sexy shape and all the others — these are superficial things and you get to learn this in a bad relationship after falling for these things and entering a relationship with your partner.
6. YOU NEED YOURSELF TO MAKE YOU HAPPY
A lot of people live in misery and need a partner to take them out of that misery — that’s a dangerous way to live, and you might only end up worsening matters for yourself. A bad relationship would teach you that the only person you need to make you happy is yourself — if a partner comes along and make you happier then that’s an added bonus. Stop waiting for a man or woman to make you happy.
7. YOU DON’T OWN ANYBODY
Some people act in a relationship like they own their partners; this is another terrible path to follow in a relationship. A relationship isn’t an affair between a boss and subordinate; try to be less possessive in your relationship — you don’t own your partner.
8. APOLOGIES ARE NECESSARY
Many people don’t know how to apologise to their partner, or they see little need for it. If you look at many bad relationships, you would observe one trend — a simple “I’m sorry” could have saved that relationship a million times.
9. YOU KNOW WHAT YOU WANT IN A PARTNER
If there is one thing a bad relationship would teach you, it’s that you know what you want in your partner. After going for looks and other superficial things and the relationship fails, you would learn and become wiser on what you truly need in a partner. A bad relationship would make you wiser.
So whenever you have that failed relationship, do not linger for long in regrets; rather, pick your lessons and come out of it wiser and stronger.
ViV