Marriage is important. It is a big deal, but it isn’t the greatest thing or achievement ever. So there’s no point rushing into marriage; take your time, evaluate your life, and make sure you’re ready to get into it. There’s is a lot of mental and emotional preparation that go with marriage. If you don’t get them right, you’re unlikely to get your marriage right.
Here are some areas we think you must set straight as a lady before getting married.
BUILD YOUR OWN LIFE
A lot of women run into marriage hoping to find a man they’ll live off. That sounds like no trouble, but it actually is a lot of problem. When a man knows your world depends on him, he can treat you however he please, whether or not you like it. However, when you have a life you set up yourself before a man comes in, you command more respect, and when the man comes, he only becomes an addition, and not the reason you’re you.
CREATE A LIST OF THINGS YOU WANT IN YOUR MAN
It’s important to go into marriage with your eyes set on something. So before you delve in, draw a list of a few things you require from your soon-to-be husband. For example, if finding a partner who follows a sustainable lifestyle is absolutely crucial for you, put that on a list as a reminder not to compromise on your core values. However, change is normal, so if you feel that your priorities are shifting and that what you thought was a deal breaker value isn’t really a deal breaker value anymore, then by all means, change your list; it’s not set in stone. But if the guy you’re heading down the aisle with right now doesn’t meet one of the criteria on your list—and you still feel it’s important— then it may be time to re-evaluate your relationship.
CREATE SPACE FOR A RELATIONSHIP TO THRIVE
A relationship cannot work unless you want it to work. You have probably lived the past years of your life trying to chase dreams and reach goals. That is great, but you have gotten to a time in your life where you want to be with someone else; if you don’t make time for it, it won’t work. So you need to psych yourself up for this new level of your growth. You must understand that it’s not just about you anymore, but about you and someone else.
FIND A MONEY MANAGEMENT PLAN
There’s a difference between being single and managing your money yourself, and being with someone. When you decide to get married, your money isn’t just yours anymore, it becomes for you and your partner. But you can’t just delve into marriage without a proper plan of how to manage your monies. What bank accounts would be used— joint or individual? Who will pay what bills, etc? These are things that must be ironed out.
YOU MUST LEARN TO STOP SHARING PERSONAL ISSUES WITH EVERYONE
There are people who just can’t keep their business to themselves. However, you’re about to get into a whole new level of life. What that means is that things that happened before can’t keep happening if you want a happy marriage. You need to learn to be more private. Do not share your relationship or marital issues with everyone because that doesn’t bring solutions, it just breeds more confusion. Your man is probably the only one you should talk to about your fears and insecurities, and if you feel like someone else needs to come in the picture, then perhaps, a very trusted friend can be the only one.